Film Analysis 3

Kristen Halbritter
Film Analysis 3: The Hunger Games
November 30, 2016
COMM 320

The Hunger Games

1) The Hunger Games is a movie that was released in 2012 with a rating of PG-13 and the major characters in this movie are Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark of District 12.  This movie is set in a post-apocalyptic world where the Capitol of Panem maintains control over 12 Districts by holding an annual 'Hunger Games.' A boy and a girl from each District are picked at random, called Tributes, to compete against one another to the death.  Every citizen watches this televised event until there is only one Tribute remaining.  Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark are the Tributes representing District 12.  Now their lives rely on their wooing, weaponry, and survival skills. How will they do in the games?

2) Peeta and Katniss have an interesting relationship. They started off only as acquaintances and the only thing they really had in common was that they both lived in District 12 and had a brief encounter with each other previously.  What really marked the beginning of their friendship/relationship was when they both were taken as Tributes to participate in the Hunger Games.  They became closer and closer in training and helped each other survive in the Games which lead to eventually winning together (even though they weren't supposed to. When they were the only two standing and thought they could win together after being told that they could, the rule changed and were told that there could only one winner.  They decided that they would rather die together than have only one of them walk out alive.  However, the game maker stopped them before they committed suicide and announced them both winners).  They relate to each other in that they originate from the same District, they were both taken to the Games, they won the Games together, and they now both live as Victors of the Games.  They relate to each other verbally in that they both acknowledge and express the mutual care and love they have developed for one another.  They also discuss their previous encounter where Peeta threw bread to Katniss when she was weak and out in the rain.  They also relate in that they kind of communicate in the same way.  Katniss and Peeta are both quiet and mellow.  Peeta, however, is more of a people pleaser.  For example, he was waving out the window when he arrived at the Capitol.  He also tried to get Katniss to leave him when he was injured because it would raise her chances of survival.

3) Katniss and Primrose (her sister): They have a very close relationship.  Out of love and concern for her sister, Katniss volunteered in her place after Prim was chosen as a Tribute.  Based off of Katniss' sacrifice to go in Prim's place, I would say that they are in the bonding stage.  She publicly displayed her commitment and love for her sister and throughout the movie expresses how much she cares about her.

Katniss and Peeta: The movie depicts their relationship to be seen in two different ways, the way the people in the movie see the two and how their relationship actually is, as seen by the viewer.  During the Games, there was an announcement that said there could be two Victors, both being from the same District.  When that was announced, Katniss went and found Peeta. When they were the last two standing, there was another announcement that stated there could only be one Victor instead of two.  Instead of one killing the other, Katniss pulled out poisonous berries for them both to eat instead of only one of them walking away alive.  Before they ate the berries, it was announced that they had both won.  Katniss and Peeta, as a result, had to lie about being madly in love and not being able to live without each other as a way to explain their actions. This would prevent people from thinking that what they did was a sign of mutiny against the Capitol by disobeying the rules.  It would prevent an uprising from the Districts.  So, the people of Panem, based on this lie, see Peeta and Katniss most likely in the integrating stage.  They see them both as the recent Victors of the Hunger Games, and as a couple.  They are seen as and referred to as a single unit.  However, their relationship, as seen by the viewer,  really develops to be in the beginning of the intensifying stage.  Even though they are only acquaintances at the beginning of the movie, they work their way up to the intensifying stage through their experience of being at the Games together and get closer and closer as a result. This is seen by their communication being more open and intimate.  Towards the end of the movie, they talk more openly with each other about feelings and what they are experiencing.

4)  One very clear conflict arose when Katniss went to get the medicine for Peeta.  It was out in the open, and she had to be aware of her surroundings to avoid getting killed.  She ran to get the medicine but after she retrieved it, she was attacked by another Tribute from District 2.  She threw a knife and it grazed Katniss' forehead.  Katniss tried to shoot her 2 times but missed.  When they met, they struggled for a while until she pinned Katniss down and put a knife to her throat.  She then started teasing Katniss about trying to help "lover boy" (Peeta) and went on by saying it was too bad that she wasn't able to help her little friend, Rue. She proceeded to say, "we killed her, and now we're going to kill you." (Rue was an alliance with Katniss.  She helped Katniss fight other Tributes and when Katniss was hurt, Rue watched over her.  Rue was killed by another Tribute and Katniss honored her by surrounding her with flowers and saluting Rue's District.)  Before the rival Tribute killed Katniss, the male from Rue's District grabbed her, ripped her off of Katniss,  pinned her against a wall and asked, "Did you kill her?!" to which she responded, "No!" and he said, "I heard you!" and while she was yelling for her ally to come help her, he yelled, "You said her name, you said her name!" and proceeded to kill her.  After doing away with her, he let Katniss get away this one time in honor of Rue.  Katniss then left and brought the medicine to Peeta.  Anyways, the conflict that I want to evaluate is between the girl from District 2 that tried to kill Katniss and Katniss herself.  This conflict obviously had an extreme style of Competing.  To be more specific, it was direct aggression, both physically and verbally.  Katniss was silent and struggling for her life while her rival threatened, ridiculed, and teased her.  This was about to be a win-lose situation ending in death until the male from Rue's district came and turned the tables in the same manner against Katniss' rival.

5) Before Katniss had to go to the Capitol on the train, she was allowed 3 minutes with her family to say goodbye.  Her sister Primrose and her mother came into the room and Katniss first reassured and said goodbye to Prim.  Then she went over to her mom and it was evident that she had little respect for her.  She looks bluntly at her mother and says, "You can't tune out again." to which her mother replies, "I won't." Katniss goes on with, "No, you can't. Not like when dad died. I won't be there anymore, you're all she has. No matter what you feel, you have to be there for her, you understand? Don't cry." She then roughly pulls her mother in for a hug and says, "Don't cry, don't, don't." This marks the end of their time together and soldiers from the Capitol take her family away.  Then Katniss' friend Gale comes in to say goodbye and tells her that she is strong and can win.  As soldiers pull Gale away, Katniss tells him to take care of them (her family) and to not let them starve.  What I think would help the relationship between Katniss and her mother is if Katniss exhibited more empathy for her mother and if her mother expressed more clearly how she is feeling, especially after the death of her husband.  They should sit down and talk about what has been going on to improve the relationship.  More specifically, they should try Collaborative Problem Solving where Katniss and her mother can express their unmet needs and problems, consider each others point of views and figure out how to overcome and work through the problems together.  However, this would have to wait for another time, after the Games are over.

6) Metacommunication could definitely be used to improve the relationship between Katniss and her mother.  From the situation described above, it is evident that they do not communicate very well.  When Katniss told her mother to not cry, you could see the look in her mother's face that expressed she was shocked and kind of hurt.  How can a mother not cry when her daughter essentially has a death sentence?  She would never see her again if she lost the Games.  Anyways, from the get go, when her mother first tuned out after the death of her husband, Katniss should have expressed that she didn't appreciate her mother's lack of communication and distance with her and Prim.  Katniss' mother should have expressed how she didn't appreciate what Katniss said to her when they were saying goodbye.  To fix their relationship, they need to use metacommunication because the problem in their relationship is overall lack of communication and expression of what is going on internally.

7) I think my communication behavior most resembles Katniss'. She speaks only when she has something important to say, and doesn't open up much to those she is not close with.  For example, when Peeta and Katniss were on the train headed to the Capitol shortly after they met, Katniss was silent when Peeta tried talking to her and asking her questions.  However, the more time she spent with him the more willing she was to talk, open up, and discuss personal experiences and feelings.

*I tried twice to put pictures in but for some reason it wasn't working...

Reflection #6

Kristen Halbritter
Reflection #6: Chapters 11 & 12
November 16, 2016
COMM 320

Chapter 11

1) The Show "Parks and Recreation"

"What has the communication climate been like at places where you've worked?  What role did supervisors have in setting and maintaining that climate?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 347

For four summers I worked at Camp Cherokee. My most recent title was Waterfront Director/Boat Driver/Lifeguard/Counselor.  The communication climate at Camp was always laid back, open, welcoming and warm.  My supervisor set the climate.  He was not only our supervisor and boss, but he was also a friend that wanted both the staff and campers to feel relaxed and welcomed.  If there was a disturbance or issue among staff, he would sometimes mediate if made known to him.  

 

*I'm a huge fan of Parks and Rec!

2) Jonathan Martin and the Miami Dolphins

"Have you encountered bullying in the workplace?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 350

Personally, I have not, at least not in the workplace.  However, when I was in elementary school, I used to be teased about my stutter.  In a previous blog I mentioned how that may have effected my communication behavior and tendency to be shy and quiet. 

Chapter 12

1) The Movie "The Hunger Games"

"What lessons for managing interpersonal conflict can you learn from stories like these?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 381

What I get from this is that interdependence and collaboration with others is what keep us going day to day.  Many people consider themselves pretty independent, but we all rely on others whether we admit it or not.  I can't imagine being completely alone, doing everything by myself.  Keeping peace in relationships with little conflict is essential for our happiness.  Relationships that are constantly in conflict are draining, and people become unhappy because of it.  What I also get from a story like this is that if you value the relationship, solve the conflict because the survival of your happiness may depend on it.

2) The TV Show "Blackish"

"How do culture and social class affect your personal and professional relationships?  Are these factors sometimes a source of conflict- and if so, how do you manage them?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 400

They affect my relationships because the social class and culture I grew up in exposed me to people only of similar culture and social class.  Because of the "culture" I grew up in, I am friends mostly with Adventist people due to being exposed mostly to Adventist people as a kid.  However, my social class and culture would never prevent me from being friends with people outside of it if I were exposed more to them.  I am just not exposed to many people who are outside of my social class and culture.  Because of being at Andrews, I have friends who are from different parts of the US and people who live out of the country.  I have learned about the languages they speak and about where they live because of it.  

These factors are not usually a source of conflict, however, one conflict did occur between a friend and I because of a misunderstanding of perspective with a current social issue.  I managed it by talking it out and being open to learning from their perspective. 

Homework #2

Kristen Halbritter
Homework #2
November 14, 2016
COMM 320

Pause and Reflect: Your Relational Stage

1) "If you are in a relationship, describe its present stage and the behaviors that characterize your communication in this stage.  Give specific examples to support your assessment." -Looking Out Looking In, page 290

I think me and my boyfriend, David, are currently at the end of the integrating stage and moving into the bonding stage.  We have shared identities, we are "FBO," and we have each sacrificed parts of our old selves.  For example, I watch football now and am a Patriots fan when previously I didn't really have an interest. We also have a "dogter" named Molly. (I don't have her here, but she is back at home in NY.  He was with me when I adopted her and was very involved in her rehabilitation/healing by visiting her with me.) I think we are going into the bonding stage because me and David are committed to each other and plan to get married in the near future even though we aren't officially engaged.  Once that has taken place I would consider us to be fully in the bonding stage.  

2) "Discuss the trend of the communication in terms of the stages described in this section.  Are you likely to remain in the present stage, or do you anticipate movement into another stage? Which one? Explain your answer." -Looking Out Looking In, page 290

Our communication is based mostly around us as a unit.  When I talk to other people about plans I have, I often use the word "us" or "we" referring to David and I.  Now, a lot of what we do like times to eat and where to eat and what to do on the weekend is based around whether we can do it together.  Now, when I am with other people and David is not with me, they will often ask about where he is and what he is up to.

As mentioned above, David and I are slowly moving into the bonding stage.  We are and have been talking about marriage even though we are not engaged yet.  We are committed to each other and talk about future plans often.  He is currently saving up for a ring. :)

3) "Describe your level of satisfaction with the answer to question 2.  If you are satisfied, describe what you can do to increase the likelihood that the relationship will operate at the stage you described.  If you are not satisfied, discuss what you can do to move the relationship toward a more satisfying stage." -Looking Out Looking In, page 290

I am very satisfied.  I strongly believe David is "the one." Since this is the farthest I have ever gotten in a romantic relationship, I do not have any experience being in the bonding stage with a significant other.  However,  to keep our hopeful engagement and future marriage happy and in the bonding stage as much as possible, I would say that good communication, immediate expression of thoughts and feelings, alone time, and a strong sense of commitment will keep us operating in the bonding stage. However, I know that s relationship cannot stay in one stage.  Marriage and any relationship has ups and downs... But if we were to stay in the bonding stage, I think the things mentioned above would be crucial.

4) "Because both parties define a relationship, define your partner's perspective.  Would she or he say that the relationship is in the same stage as you described? If not, explain how your partner would describe it.  What does your partner do to determine the stage at which your relationship operates? (Give specific examples.) How would you like your partner to behave in order to move the relationship to or maintain the stage you desire? What can you do to encourage your partner to behave in the way you desire?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 290

David and I think we are pretty much in the same stage.  He considers us to already be in the bonding stage even though we aren't engaged or anything.  We are committed and plan to get engaged so he considers that already in the bonding stage.   He says we are past the FBO in integrating and we have become one identity in many ways.  He says we have already publicly displayed and declared our exclusivity to peers and families. 
Our families are actually pretty invested in our relationship.  They expect us to get married and David has met a bulk of my family and I have met the bulk of his.  He has even come with us on family vacations.  I am content with the way David behaves as it is currently.  If I could change anything, it would be him asking me to marry him.  I want to be engaged pretty badly.  I already encourage him to do so by mentioning it and talking about the future even though I know he has a ring picked out,  is planning the proposal, and is saving up for the ring. 

5) "Now consider a relationship (friendship or romance) you have been in that has terminated.  How well does this Knapp model describe the development and decline of that relationship?  If the model doesn't match, develop a new model to illustrate your relationship's pattern." -Looking Out Looking In, page 290

I would say the Knapp model reflects the relationship I am thinking of pretty well.  It peaked when we talked about the future and plans for the future for years to come and we functioned as one unit and did everything together.  Then we just kind of slowly drifted apart and became our own individual person.  We just stopped spending time with each other and it slowly and eventually terminated.

What is Your Love Language? 

When I took this assessment, I got the result of having Acts of Service at the top, then Physical Touch, Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, then Receiving Gifts.  Acts of service really do make me feel loved. For example, when I'm in the car with David, I really appreciate it when he offers to pump the gas.  I really appreciate it when he is willing to help me carry my stuff to the car and help me move in and out of the dorm every year.  When we hit a rough patch, I felt awful when he didn't help me walk my stuff to the car.  

When I took the assessment, David was with me, so after I finished, he took it as well.  He got Physical Touch, Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Receiving Gifts, then Acts of Service.  I thought it was interesting that my top love language was his last.  He told me that even though it is his last, he likes to do Acts of Service for me and other people so it was a good fit.  I'm kind of glad that Physical Touch was in both of our top love languages, because that means we are compatible in that way.  We like to receive it, so we will most likely express it to one another.  

I really enjoyed doing this assessment, it was interesting to see both mine and David's preferences! 

Reflection #5

Kristen Halbritter
Reflection 5: Chapters 9 & 10
November 9, 2016
COMM 320

Chapter 9

"Relfies: Good for You and Your Relationships"

a. "Which of the research conclusions in this readings rings most true for you? Which does not?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 298

One conclusion that is true for me is when the author says, "People take relfies when they are happy and having fun.  Emphasizing the good times in relationships benefits your relationships by increasing emotional intimacy, trust, and satisfaction." - Looking Out Looking In, page 298 

I usually take "relfies" when I am having fun whether it be with friends or with my significant other. I think it does make the relationship better because taking a "relfie" indicates that you think the event is fun enough to document.  

Another conclusion that I can relate with is, "Did you and your partner do something new, interesting, and/or challenging? (think: skydiving relfie, surfing lessons relfie, tried a new restaurant relfie).  Research shows that these types of experiences help you grow as a person and improve the quality of your relationships." -Looking Out Looking In, page 298  

It's similar to the last conclusion I mentioned.  Usually new, adventurous activities are fun, so I like to document it.  I think that "relfies" with friends or your significant other improves the relationship because it requires you to be in close proximity with the person, and it (most of the time) requires you to smile.  So, "relfies" help people correlate fun, happiness and closeness with the person they are taking it with.

One of the conclusions I do not really see as truthful is, "Couples who relfie together stay together.  Couples who have more of a "we" identity tend to have higher relationship satisfaction, intimacy, and commitment." -Looking Out Looking In, page 298  

I don't relfie with my friends or my significant other a whole ton... and I don't think it defines the amount of satisfaction, intimacy and commitment I feel from the relationships I have.  However, I can see how doing it might make one feel close to the one they are "relfie-ing" with.  However, I don't think taking "relfies" is a super important component in a relationship.

Two other conclusions that kind of go together that I don't necessarily agree with are, "Couples who feel closer to each other are more likely to display things (perhaps relfies on Twitter) that let the world know they are a couple" and "Others see you as having a better romantic relationship. No relfie? People might perceive less of a connection between you and your partner." -Both from Looking Out Looking In, page 298
I don't post many relfies on social media with my significant other, hardly at all, and that is because we like to keep our relationship kind of private.  I don't have to show off my relationship on social media often when people already know I am with someone.  Even though I can see why posting pictures with sappy captions might make someone think I have a better romantic relationship, I feel like people think well of my relationship despite not having many of them.  I just think that a relationship shouldn't be judged based on the amount of pictures someone may post with their significant other.

b. "Can you think of a social networking page that doesn't accurately reflect a friend's interpersonal relationships?  Explain how you arrived at that perception and what changes could be made." -Looking Out Looking In, page 298

I don't use every social networking site, but the one that I use that I think doesn't reflect a friend's interpersonal relationships in today's age is Gmail.  Most people use it as a business type of communication site.  Friends don't chat on Gmail like they used to and most people use Gmail to remain in contact with people they do not have close relationships with.  I think the way Gmail is used today is perfectly fine because we have a number of other sites to display our interpersonal relationships on.  A way to make Gmail better reflect interpersonal relationships would be to show who each person stays in contact with most, allow you to post pictures, or just all together get rid of other social networking sites. 

2) The Movie "The Fault in Our Stars"

"How have you communicated support to loved ones who were going through challenging times? What kind of support do you most like to receive?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 304

I have shown support to loved ones through text if I am far away by sending encouraging messages, or by verbal and physical support when I am with someone who is hurting.  I show verbal support by saying everything will be alright and other encouraging things and I show physical support by hugging the person or just being there to help them in a time of need. 
The kind of support I most definitely like is physical support.  When I'm hurt and feeling low I like to just be held with silence or some encouraging words being said.  When the time is right for me, I will start opening up and talking.

Chapter 10

1) The Movie "Her"

"To what degree do you think social media help you meet your intimacy needs? To what degree do they limit interpersonal intimacy?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 317

I think social media can meet some intimacy needs in that it allows you to talk to people privately and you can send emojis and express feelings, etc.  With other means of communication, like through skype, you can actually see each other which meets a need more than just typing words.  However, I think intimacy needs cannot be fully satisfied through social media like it could be in person.  Just merely seeing and being next to a person can fulfill intimacy needs.  Social media limits intimacy needs because you aren't with the loved one in person.  You can't feel their presence and you get no physical contact.  For me, a big part of intimacy is being able to physically be with a person and being able to touch them. 

2) The Movie "What If"

"Do you think platonic friendships can be maintained when there is the potential for romance in a relationship?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 329

To me, this question can be taken two different ways, so I will answer both of them.

Personally, I think yes and no.  If someone is in an affectionate friendship with someone and there is potential for a romantic relationship to blossom, I think it will either go forward into the romantic relationship or be terminated or maintained.  If one of the two in the friendship say that they can't have a relationship with the person for some reason, I personally would want to terminate the friendship all together because hanging out with the person as friends when you want something more with them would be torturous, at least in my opinion.  Especially when you're already super comfortable with them and you're great friends.  If somehow the friendship went on even when wanting a romantic relationship, it would be very stressful and hard to move on to another person.  So, I think it could go either way.  

If my significant other had a platonic friendship with someone of the opposite sex when I started dating them, I would have felt kind of uncomfortable.  So I would say the answer to the question is a yes and a no... platonic relationships can or cannot be maintained depending on how I went about addressing it.  I would talk to my significant other and express how I felt threatened by such an affectionate friendship and would ask to maybe tone it down.  Either that, or I would express how I felt and would ask for reassurance every now and then to help me not feel threatened and gain more trust.

Film Analysis #2

Kristen Halbritter
Film Analysis #2: The Office
November 2, 2016
COMM 320

The Office

 1) "The Office" is a TV show that first aired March 24, 2005 and was given a rating of TV-14.  This entire series from beginning to end documents the everyday lives of those working in the Scranton, PA branch of the Dunder Mifflin Paper Company under branch manager, Michael Scott.  Throughout the series, the Scranton branch experiences many changes and faces different challenges.

For this analysis, I watched the first and second episode of season 1.  The first episode, called "Pilot," introduces the characters to the documentary crew that will be following them throughout the years.  Additionally, someone from corporate, named Jan Levinson, comes into the office to talk with Michael Scott, the branch manager about possible downsizing.  

In the second episode, called "Diversity Day," corporate sends someone in to talk about embracing diversity and more importantly discuss some of the issues going on in the office regarding offensive remarks... mostly made by Michael.  After the presenter was done, Michael decides to lead his own "Diversity Day" discussion and activity.  

The main characters so far in this series are the following:

Michael Scott: Branch Manager

Jim Halpert: Salesman

Pam Beesly: Receptionist

Dwight Schrute: Salesman

2) Even after just watching the first two episodes of a 9 season long show, many different principles and concepts from chapters 5-8 of Looking Out Looking in could be observed among the character's interactions.  However, two instances in these two episodes stood out to me when it came to the principles discussed in the book.  

a. In chapter 7 of Looking Out Looking In, the topic of nonverbal communication is discussed.  Different types of nonverbal communication include environment, paralinguistics, proxemics, and territoriality.  In episode 1, Dwight and Jim are sitting at the same desk group right next to each other.  While Jim is on a phone call, Dwight displays territoriality by pushing anything that overlaps onto his desk that belongs to Jim back onto Jim's desk with a ruler.  In retaliation, Jim sets up pencils that stick straight up in between the two desks and tapes them also to his phone, tape dispenser and other things on his desk.

b. Chapter 8 of Looking Out Looking In discusses listening.  One of the sections of this chapter talks about the different types of ineffective listening which includes pseudolistening, stage-hogging, selective listening, insulated listening, defensive listening, and insensitive listening.  In the second episode, Michael very well displays stage-hogging.  When the Diversity Day speaker, Mr. Brown, came to the office and started talking, Michael continually interrupted and would try to steal the show.  For example, Mr. Brown says, "Alright, here's what we are going to do.  Uh, I've noticed that uh..." and before he could even continue, Michael turns the conversation to himself by saying, "You know what? Here's what we're gonna do..." and continues by giving his own input on what he thinks should be done. He  shows little interest or respect toward the speaker and what he is saying and he is also very uncooperative and does not sign the form handed out after the presentation that states he learned something.  Additionally, he literally hogs the "stage" by standing up front with the speaker until he is asked to sit down.  Even then, he sits in a chair that is up front and right next to the speaker.

3) As illustrated above, Michael has some listening issues. So the advice I would give him from the book Looking Out Looking In would be in regard to listening better.  The book lists a couple things that can be done to improve listening skills including talking less, get rid of distractions, don't judge prematurely, and to look for key ideas. The main advice I would give him would be to talk less.  That is his main problem being a stage hogger.  Another thing he could work on is not judging prematurely. I think Michael did this when he was criticized for the inappropriate and offensive remark he has been doing in the office.  After that was mentioned, I'm sure that he judged Mr. Brown prematurely, before he even got his point across,  and avoided listening to him from then on. 

4) The character that reminds me most of my communication behavior is Pam.  In the beginning of the first episode, Michael introduces the documentary crew to Pam while she is sitting at her desk.  Michael is kind of obnoxious while doing so and says her name 3 times kind of loudly at a high pitch voice.  He is also immature when he makes a comment on her looks and asks if he has any faxes. When Pam gives him the fax, Michael realizes it is from corporate and says how he told her that there is a special filing cabinet for things from corporate. Pam says, "You haven't told me that" and Michael quickly says, "Its called the waste paper basket" and starts laughing.  Throughout this whole ordeal, Pam is very quiet, to herself, shy, and soft spoken. She doesn't say anything to Michael probably because he is her superior and her facial expressions give the impression that she is annoyed and doesn't know what to think of him.  It seems like she suppresses her feelings as well. I feel I am like her because if I was annoyed by a superior, like my boss, I wouldn't say anything and I would just be silent and do what is expected of me.  I am also pretty quiet and soft spoken and keep a lot of my feelings to myself, which I think Pam does in this situation. 

Reflection 4: Chapters 7 & 8

Kristen Halbritter
October 26, 2016
COMM 320
Reflection 4: Chapters 7 & 8

Chapter 7

1)  "The Eyes Have It"

a. "Observe the degree of eye contact others use when they engage with you.  Based on your experience, what is the optimal level of eye contact in varying types of relationships and contexts?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 228.

To me, eye contact is a sign that the other person is comfortable, cares, and has respect for you.  I think in every context as a sign of respect for anyone, there should be some eye contact. When you are talking to a superior, I think maintaining eye contact is very important.  It shows that you are listening and are being respectful.  However, just like in any context, you don't want to make so much eye contact that it makes the person uncomfortable.  Every once in a while you should look away, probably when it is your turn to talk.  When you are talking to someone you don't know as well, it is harder to maintain eye contact because you may be uncomfortable.  However, as mentioned before, I think everyone should receive even a little eye contact just to show general respect.  Years ago, like in 7th or 8th grade, I remember one of my friends really disliked a teacher we had. I remember seeing her interact with the teacher to ask a question or something and she gave eye contact that was all over the place.  Her eyes were looking at pretty much everything but the teachers eyes with just short glances.  In a relationship where there is little respect or care for the other person, eye contact is very difficult to give and even receive from the other person.  With people I am super close with, like my significant other, my family, and good friends, giving and maintaining eye contact comes naturally and is easy to give. In conclusion,  everyone in any context or type of relationship deserves eye contact in my opinion. The closer you are to a person and the more superior a person may be over you, the more eye contact they (should) receive. 

b. "Pay attention to your level of eye contact in important personal relationships.  How might adjusting this level change the nature of your interactions?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 228.

If I give less eye contact than normal, it might indicate something is bothering me or that I am annoyed or upset by something.  If I give more eye contact it might indicate that I am feeling happier than normal.  Related to interactions, less eye contact might lead to more shallow and shorter conversations while more eye contact might lead to longer, more meaningful conversations.

2) "The movie Crazy, Stupid Love"

"How much does your appearance affect how you feel about yourself?  Can it change the way you interact with others?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 235.

I think the way people dress tells a lot about how they think of themselves.  I think if people think they are respectable, they will dress respectable.  For me, comfort is above all when it comes to my clothes.  I love shorts, t-shirts, jeans, and sweaters.  I don't keep up with style or fashion and I feel good in the way I dress.  I don't dress super fancy or anything, but I dress respectably and dress according to the occasion.  For me, at least right now, the way I dress doesn't really affect how I feel about myself.  I remember a few years ago I had pretty low self esteem and I thought I was 'chubby.'  The way I dressed reflected that.  I wore sweat pants and hid under baggy clothes. Now I feel comfortable with how I look and I feel differently about myself, so I am more comfortable wearing whatever I feel like wearing.  

Yes, the way I dress can affect the way I interact with others.  Sometimes, when interacting with others who are dressed fancier than me, I feel inferior to them.  When I am under dressed for an occasion, my self-confidence and willingness to interact may go down because I am worried about what everyone else is thinking of my wardrobe.  If I think I am dressed well and look good, I will be more confident in my interactions because I won't be worried about what others think of how I am dressed.

 Chapter 8

1)  "The movie 50/50" 

"What kinds of listening responses do you offer when someone you know is hurting?  What kind of responses do you like to receive when you're the one struggling?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 266.

A lot of the time I will ask them if they want to talk about it or I will reassure them that I am here if they want to talk about it.  Whether they open up or not I will hug them or comfort them with other gestures. When I know what is bothering the person or why they are hurting, I will say things that will comfort them and will try to cheer them up by talking about other things or by trying to make them laugh.  

When I am struggling myself, I like people to just let me cry and be with me.  I like it silent a lot of the time.  I don't like people prodding me to open up, I like to do it on my own time.  I just like to know that there is an option to open up and that there is someone there for me if need be.  

2) "The show Scandal"

"Are there times when you want advice more than empathy? Is it possible to give some of both?" -Looking Out Looking In, page 269.

Hardly.  I like advice only when I ask for it.  Even empathy is sometimes not the best for me when I'm struggling and hurting.  I like it to be silent sometimes more than people being empathetic towards me.  However, I definitely prefer empathy over advice.  

Yes, it is possible to give some of both. If you are going to give both, I would show empathy first and indicate that you know what they're going through and then give advice based on your experience. However, a lot of the time, I think people that are hurting need empathy the most and advice should only be given when asked for.

Reflection 3: Chapters 5 & 6

Kristen Halbritter
October 19, 2016
COMM 320
Reflection 3: Chapters 5 & 6

Chapter 5

1) The movie ‘Inside Out’ 

“Are you able to recognize your emotions when you experience them?” -Looking Out Looking In, page 152

I would say I recognize my emotions pretty well when I experience them.  However, sometimes I don’t realize what I’m feeling until someone asks me whats wrong or why I’m acting a certain way. When my emotions are very strong, I for sure recognize them and can tell someone myself how I am feeling and will often express it.  For example, when I’m super happy, I’ll express that I am.  If I am feeling very frustrated and upset, then I’ll let people know why.  When my emotions are not as strong, I may not be super aware unless someone mentions something to me.

2) The TV show ‘Revenge’

“What emotions typically accompany a desire for vengeance?” -Looking Out Looking In, page 159

The first emotion that came to mind when I read this question was anger.  In my own experience, I would want revenge when someone made me angry.  A very mild example in my experience would be losing a soccer game.  I would want revenge on the opposite team, to beat them the next meet up after getting upset about losing or getting upset with a certain player on the team.

Besides anger, I think another emotion that can make someone feel revengeful is sadness.  I think of Ramases the Pharaoh of Egypt after Moses, through God, sent the plagues.  After he let the Israelites leave Egypt, Ramases shortly went after them. I personally think some of the reason as to why he wanted to go after them had to do with revenge and I can imagine he was especially feeling sadness as well as anger due to his country being in ruins and his son being killed by the final plague.

Chapter 6

1) The movie ‘Mean Girls’

“Does your language reflect the groups to which you belong?”  -Looking Out Looking In, page 188

I think so.  One time I was talking with a friend about a certain program she wanted to join and she went on to explain that the people in the program speak a certain way.  She told me they speak more intellectually and proper than the average student and that she appreciated that and wanted to be a part of that.  I think some of the things I say reflect the groups of people I spend time with.  For example, I sometimes say things in Samoan because I was good friends with a Samoan family/community that would constantly use those words.  I also have certain sayings that only people in a certain group would understand or find relateable and funny.  For example, the saying, “cut me a piece.”

2) Language and Heritage

“Can you think of words and names that others use for you that denote their relationship with you,  similar to how hearing the word “Mi’ja” led Sandra Cisneros to think of her father?” -Looking Out Looking In, page 207

a.  Yes, when someone calls me “Kris” it reminds me of an old friend I no longer have contact with.  They always called me that and hardly no one else called me that.  So when people on occasion call me “Kris” I immediately think of them. 

b. “If you know another language, describe how certain concepts are difficult to translate from one language to another. Discuss the role that culture plays in this phenomenon.” -Looking Out Looking In, page 207

I don’t know another language fluently, but I know that my great grandmother had this joke she would say in Oneida and my mom told me she asked her to tell it in English and my great grandma responded with “It wouldn’t be as funny!”
I have also seen different words that represent feelings or things that we don’t have words for in English.  For example, the Filipino word “Gigil” that is a word used to describe ‘the urge to pinch or squeeze something that is irresistibly cute.’ -mentalfloss.com 
I can imagine that different languages have words for different things because it is more of a common thing to happen in the culture that the language is a part of.  Furthermore, the feelings or things that we don't have words for in English happen more or are used or felt more in other cultures that the language is a part of.